Free Yourself from Fear
Personal Empowerment Coach
World peace begins with inner peace.
What is reflected on the outer is merely a mirror
of what is on the inner.
Trying to change the world without working to change consciousness
is like trying to change the image in a mirror
without changing the object that is being reflected.
The physical environment and circumstances we experience,
are merely a reflection of our consciousness.
Our consciousness is created by our thoughts -- the true creative force.
To change our consciousness we must transform all our limiting thoughts.
This can be done effectively by using the Free Yourself process.
© Carol Hansen Grey, author Free Yourself from Fear, 1999
If you would like to schedule a private Free Yourself coaching session via Zoom with Carol, click on the graphic below.
FREE YOURSELF FROM FEAR: The Process
A Course in Miracles teaches that only LOVE is real. It tells us that fear is merely an illusion, something we made up. However at this time of global uncertainty and unrest, when fear appears to be everywhere, how do we keep ourselves centered in Love? How do we bring ourselves to a place of inner peace when every day we hear reports of another threat to our safety? How do we, as spiritually conscious people, acknowledging our oneness with all life, open our hearts to embrace those who are filled with very focused anger?
The truth is, when we allow ourselves to harbor fear, whether or not we acknowledge it, we actually add energy and power to those who see us as the enemy. The most important thing we can do to dispel our fears is to acknowledge those fears and to transform them at the cause level.
The Free Yourself from Fear process is a tool that transforms fear because it works at the cause level. Victor and I have been successfully using this process in our own lives and with clients for over 20 years. The results are always amazing.
As our way of helping visitors to our website utilize this process we have decided to publish the text of our Free Yourself from Fear booklet in this space for you to print out for your own personal use. Please respect the copyright notice at the bottom.
FREE YOURSELF FROM FEAR
A Spiritual Process of Empowerment
Carol Hansen Grey
Since 1995 Victor and I have been meditating each morning with A Course in Miracles (The Course). The time we spend together in meditation has become the most important part of the day for us, personally and as a couple. It gives us an opportunity not only to connect with our Source (we call it “tuning in”) but also to connect with each other on a level that would not be tapped in the normal course of our day.
Our meditation period has a four-part structure: Learning, Listening, Sharing and Giving Thanks. We begin by taking turns reading to each other out of The Course (learning) and then we go into a silent meditation where we let what we have just read sink in, instruct and inspire us (listening). After a period of silent “connecting” we then share with each other any inspiration that came up during our silent time (sharing). This sharing can last anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour or more. We end our meditation time by verbalizing what it is we are grateful for in that moment (giving thanks).
We did not always meditate together—we started about a year into the relationship. We had entered into a conscious relationship and it has been wonderful since the beginning. However, once we began our daily meditation our relationship took on a new energy. It became co-creative. Barbara Marx Hubbard describes a co-creative couple as combining their genius with Spirit to birth and liberate their full creative potential selves. We feel that is what has happened to us since we began meditating together. It was as if our creative abilities were unleashed and we found we were able to accomplish more in one year than either one of us had been able independently to accomplish in 10 years!
While reading The Course during our meditations, I find that Jesus often speaks to me directly, expanding my awareness into areas of my life that need attention. The following process came directly out of one of our meditations. Jesus and other masters have told us that “there are no idle thoughts.” Every thought creates and Jesus says emphatically, “I cannot stress strongly enough how important it is to guard your thoughts.”
St. Germain on the same topic says, “Governing your thoughts takes determined watchfulness; but it must be done. If strangers began to open the door and pass through one’s home unannounced and unwelcomed, I am sure it would not be long until the individual locked the door and, if necessary, placed a notice outside that only those invited might enter, and none without being announced.” He goes on to explain that we allow “uninvited and unwelcomed” thoughts to pass through the chambers of our minds where they create havoc in our lives, but we continue to leave the door open. Close the door!
In The Course, Jesus says that we all have fears and that many of us ask him to take away our fears. But, he says, he cannot do that because our fears are something that we have made up. They are not real. And he cannot help us dispel something that is not real. That would be trying to make change at the “effect” level where permanent change can never occur. He says, however, that he can help us at the “cause” level, and the cause of our fear is our thoughts.
An analogy that might help you understand that principle is as follows: If you are typing on the computer with your fingers on the wrong keys, when you look up at the monitor you will see “garbage.” Trying to change what has just happened at the “effect’ level would be like putting “white-out” on the monitor screen to correct the error; or printing out the file and putting white-out on the paper; or a more drastic step would be to throw out the monitor and get a new one. Of course, none of these solutions will work because the file needs to be changed at the input or “cause” level. Many of us go through our lives trying to “fix” things at the effect level and we wonder why things don’t change.
Our fears are created by our thoughts and it is at that level (the cause level) that Jesus can and will help us. He said to me, “If you are willing to get in touch with the thoughts that are beneath your fears and turn them over to me, I will transform them.”
I did not realize at the time what a powerful message had just been given me. However, its power soon became apparent as Victor and I began sharing. That morning we started on a journey of exploring areas where we had fear. But instead of dismissing our negative thoughts around our fears or saying an affirmation to “blanket” them (tactics we both had been in the habit of utilizing), we got in touch with them. And as each thought came up, we turned each of them over to Jesus, asking him to transform them. (We used the words, “Jesus, transform that thought.”)
The meditation that morning led me on a three day journey of getting in touch with my fears around money. I found that as I turned over one thought, hundreds began to pour in. It was like pulling a brick out of a foundation and watching the entire structure begin to collapse. It was almost overwhelming at first, appearing to be much too many thoughts to transform. And it would have been overwhelming if it had been up to me to transform them. But that was not my “job”—that was the job Jesus had promised to take on. My job was to have the willingness to get in touch with the thoughts and to turn them over to Jesus for transformation.
I found after three days of this process that I was finally able to get in touch with a “core” thought. If you were to ask me, “Carol, what is one of your virtues?” I would say to you, “I am a responsible person.” I truly believe that about myself. I was carrying around a thought, however, that I was not responsible with money. Well, how can I hold such opposing thoughts in my consciousness and still function in life? What is it that I create in my life to be able to function with two such opposing thoughts? I create not having any money! If I don’t have any money to be responsible for, I can continue believing that I am a responsible person! That morning a totally unexpected check for $450 arrived in the mail.
I felt validated and free of a fear that had been running my life for many years.
Now I felt the process was over, but I soon realized that I had only accomplished Step One: Turning Over the Obvious Thoughts, the ones that stand out there and show themselves. Step Two is getting in touch with what I have come to call the “rodent” thoughts. Those are the thoughts that appear like mice in your house. If you’ve ever thought you had a mouse in your house, you know how every once in a while out of the corner of your eye you see a shadow dart across the kitchen floor. But when you turn your head to see it fully, it has disappeared into the dark corners of your cupboard where it lives and is probably breeding.
Well, rodent thoughts are thoughts that follow that pattern. They scamper across your consciousness so quickly that you are not even sure what they look like. And in an instant they are gone, into the cupboards of your mind, where they live and create.
I became aware of rodent thoughts the next morning in meditation when Victor said to me, “I can’t wait for the mail today to see how much money arrives!” As he said that, a thought “scampered” across my consciousness so quickly that I did not even know what it was. I had only a slight awareness of the “scampering” activity. My first inclination was to dismiss it. But because I had been “processing thoughts” for the past three days, I was very aware of the creativeness of all our thoughts and the importance of turning over any “negative” thought to be transformed. So instead of dismissing it, I closed my eyes and invited it to show itself. The thought looked something like this: “Why would you think money is going to show up in the mail today. Money doesn’t just show up.” Jesus, transform that thought!
What we have found in working with this process is that it takes a real vigilance to be aware of and recognize those ‘rodent’ thoughts that are creating havoc in our lives and to turn them over for transformation. Victor and I continually “prompt” each other whenever one of us says something that is in some way limiting or negative by lovingly commenting, “Well, that’s a thought!”
We have also found that there are certain thoughts that have become such a “comfortable” part of our lives, that sometimes, even though we know they are negative, we feel hesitant to give them up for transformation. They might be likened to old clothes in the closet that no longer fit, but we don’t get rid of them because we hold on to a memory of a time when they served us. When we clean out our closets, we make room for new clothes that can serve us now. When we clean out the closets of our mind, we make room for the new “invited” thoughts that will serve us now and be a positive energy in our lives.
I was counseling someone recently who was despondent about her work situation. She told me how awful it was, her boss was difficult, everyone around her was negative, it was unrewarding to be there. I asked her if she was willing to ask for those thoughts to be transformed. She said to me, “But you don’t understand, my job is terrible!” I said, “Are you willing to have that thought transformed?” Again, she said to me, “Carol, you’re not getting it. It’s not just a thought, it’s real!”
“I’m not asking you if its real or not,” I said. “What I am asking you is whether or not you are willing to take the thought that your job is terrible and turn it over for transformation.” She began to cry and said, “Yes”. So I guided her to say, “Jesus transform the thought that my job is terrible.” Then I asked her, “What thought just came in to take its place?” She replied, “It won’t work.” I asked her if she was willing to turn that thought over also. She did. We began to work with each new thought that came in until she got the picture of the vigilance that is involved in this process.
She called me a week later to tell me that she had already begun to notice changes in her life. She said, until starting this process, she had never been aware of how many negative thoughts she was carrying around. Within just a few months this woman’s work environment changed completely. Her boss retired, her co-workers began appreciating her and it became a pleasure for her to go to her job each day.
A couple on the verge of divorce wrote to me to say that they had used the process to save their marriage and as a bonus the husband had found a new job which turned his life around.
In another instance, I helped a professional singer get in touch with her thoughts that “she was invisible.” (Of course, she didn’t know she had that core thought until we uncovered several layers of other negative thoughts.) For years she has been praying for a meaningful relationship in her life as well as an opportunity to travel worldwide with her music. Within two weeks of working this process she met the man of her dreams, is now married to him, living in England and singing internationally.
Another woman came to me who was experiencing a tremendous amount of fear in her life. I shared the process with her and she said to me, “Yeah, I know the mind does crazy things. I try not to pay attention to it.” I grabbed her by the arm and said intensely, “That is exactly what I am trying to tell you. YOU NEED TO PAY ATTENTION!” She gasped and said, “Oh my God, I get it!”
This process is different from “canceling” your thoughts or “affirming” a positive thought to counteract a negative thought. This process takes the “energy” of a negative thought and transforms that energy into a positive force in your life.
A particular man came to mind as I started analyzing how this process works. This man took a creature that everyone universally dislikes and transformed that creature into a symbol of happiness and joy that is recognized the world over. The man: Walt Disney. The symbol: A Mouse.
I invite you to begin this very rewarding process. Share it with those around you who are supportive. Start a buddy system where you give permission to your “buddy” to ask you if you have any rodent thoughts. Sometimes we all need to be reminded and/or encouraged to use this process. Especially when we are having thoughts we might know are negative and yet on some level we feel “justified” in holding on to them. Thoughts where we judge ourselves to be “right,” especially if we feel we have been “wronged”.
I recently found myself enveloped in that particular thought energy. And even though I was familiar with this process and knew its power, I needed Victor to gently guide me into asking that my judgmental thoughts be transformed. I was locked into that negative energy field and felt powerless to process by myself. I even strongly resisted Victor’s gentle nudging.
But he was persistent and finally I asked to have the thoughts transformed. Within a minute, I was at peace. POWERFUL!
This is another one of those processes, like “Lighten Up” and the “World Peace Experiment” that can change not only you, but bring peace to the planet through a change in consciousness. It all begins with each of us attaining a state of inner peace.
All that we are is the result of what we have thought.
The mind is everything. What we think, we become.
The Free Yourself from Fear process is a powerful tool that helps a person break through any type of physical, mental or emotional limitation. It is a simple process that can be done any time a person is feeling a negative or limiting emotions such as anger, fear, grief, frustration, disempowerment. Once a person has listened to the CD or read about the process, it can be done without any further guidance. However, often people find they would like help getting started with the process.
Carol offers private Personal Empowerment telephone sessions to those living in the United States or Canada. During a session Carol guides the client to uncover and transform their limiting thoughts that have them stuck in a pattern of disempowerment and/or fear. At the end of the session Carol also brings the client through a Law of Attraction exercise that helps them jumpstart the personal empowerment dynamic.
Phone sessions are $90/hour (sliding scale available -- please ask). Once a week I also offer complimentary sessions upon request. You can be put on a waiting list for a comp session by contacting me. Sessions typically take between one to two hours. Prior to the initial session, it is helpful if the client is familiar with the Free Yourself from Fear process by having listened to the Free Yourself from Fear CD or by reading the online Free Yourself from Fear booklet.
If you are scheduling a phone consultation and live in the United States, the phone call will be initiated by Carol and is included in the session fee. If you live in Canada you will need to initiate and pay for the call.
NOTE: At this time, the phone consultation service is only available to those living in the United States or Canada. If you would like to make an appointment for an Empowerment Coaching Session, leave a message at the phone number below or use the Contact Form on this site and Carol will call you back to schedule an appointment.
Carol Was a Light During a Dark Night of the Soul
I have had the privilege to have worked with Carol Hansen Grey on several occasions toward the end of what were some of the most difficult years of my life.
She was a huge light in a very dark night of the soul. I had just come off several prescription medications that I believe were suppressing many of my family traumas that had not been fully realized until the work I did with Carol. What happened was very miraculous, and I know I couldn't have processed any of it without her help.
I was born third in line in my family. My sister was five, and my brother had just been born when my mother got pregnant with me just a couple of months later. She was very sick with pneumonia when she delivered my brother.
My mother and I were never very close while I was growing up, and later in life she didn't understand my career choices of being a musician or electing to have an abortion. On her death bed she wrote a very mean letter to me bringing up everything I had ever done wrong in my life, and my father was instructed to give it to me after her passing.
I struggled for many years with why she had written a letter like this, and it was my last memory of her. She had never expressed her disapproval of my abortion very clearly when she was alive, but my mother never did express herself very well with me, and all of that disapproval came out in the form of anger when she was dying and wrote it to me.
Over the holidays this last year I came down with pneumonia several days before the anniversary of my mother's death. I was very sick, and was still recovering from the medication withdrawals that had left me in pretty rough shape. I was really struggling to find some reason to keep going in my life as I had been through quite a rough 15 years prior to this.
A friend introduced me to Carol and thought she might be able to help me. We went to work by phone while I was down in bed seriously ill. Carol helped me peel away layers of what had happened with my mother. During my work with her, I ended up in the hospital for a few days. When I came home, I had one of the biggest ah ha moments in my life. I had never had pneumonia in my life prior to this infection. I had no idea how hard it was to get over, and never understood what my mother sacrificed to have me when she had been sick with my brother before my conception. Women didn't have the option of abortions when she was younger, and she never would have considered not having me.
I believe my mother was deeply hurt by my insistence that she never wanted me and I was a mistake. I now understand how difficult it must have been to have a third child after being as sick as she was and what a sacrifice she made to have me. I deeply understand her hurt and anger at me for the abortion now.
Thank you, Carol......the healing I had was very profound.
M.C. from Scottsdale, AZ
Transforming Fears Transformed My Diagnosis
Carol Hansen Grey is an amazing human being who was a great support to me when I was experiencing a major health problem. I had gone to the emergency room at a local hospital, feeling the most excruciating pain I had ever experienced. A CAT scan was performed, and the doctor diagnosed the pain as resulting from the passing of a kidney stone. The doctor also noted that several tumors had been observed in the CAT scan. After a number of tests, biopsies and additional CAT scans, I received a diagnosis of lymphoma from my surgeon. Needless to say, I was absolutely distraught; my father had died from lymphoma. I am by nature a very positive, upbeat person, but I was very scared and felt as if I was on an emotional roller coaster, trying to maintain a positive attitude but not succeeding. After sharing my diagnosis and distressed mental state with a friend, she suggested that I contact Carol for support.
Carol used a process with me called "Free Yourself From Fear." During this process, she supported me in bringing to light the layers of fearful thoughts I was holding around the diagnosis of lymphoma. The negative thoughts and feelings that emerged in my mind ranged from my fear of death, to concern about the people I loved, to cleaning up my trust and my house so that all my affairs would be in order. Gradually, through Carol's mentoring, I began to experience positive thoughts and feelings, full of hope and gratitude. The outcome of Carol's mentoring was to enable me to transform my fears as we worked together. In addition, in the weeks following our session, I was able to continue to transform the fearful and limiting thoughts as they surfaced, unbidden in my mind. I found myself feeling calmer and more focused on how my body was healthy and my mind was filled with peace.
I underwent a serious operation to finalize the diagnosis, and the findings were negative; I did not have lymphoma. I am truly grateful to Carol for supporting me in rediscovering my own inner strength and positive energy. I also appreciate Carol's willingness to share this powerful tool, as well as many others, in her new book, Simple Healing Tools.
C.B. from Walnut Creek, CA
SIMPLE HEALING TOOLS TESTIMONIALS (Available on AMAZON.COM)
This is Practical Spirituality!
I'm grateful that Carol has compiled the inspiring stories and the essential, practical spiritual growth tools that she has been sharing for years into one inviting and easy-to-use reference guide. In this one sweet volume Carol helps connect the dots in a "how to" guide fashion for all spiritual beings living a human existence. I now steer clients towards this fabulous resource because there is a gift and a growth opportunity for anyone who opens the book.
~Veronica from San Francisco Bay Area
Incredible insight to the power of your mind!
Reading these simple tools was exciting enough, but to actually apply them and feel them work within you is amazing. They may be simple tools, but they sure are powerful! This book can't help but bring more happiness to anyone who reads it. Thank You Carol!
~Larry from Clayton, CA
Carol's Stories and the Simple Tools That Changed Her life, Will Change Yours, Too!
Carol Hansen Grey has succeeded in creating an amazingly simple yet extremely powerful compilation of stories and corresponding tools that will transform your life from the moment you read the first "story" and flip back to read and engage in the use of the first "tool." For me it was the "Free Yourself from Fear" stories (Story 20) and the clear and easy-to-follow steps to take (Tool 9, p. 181) that changed my life at a time when I was consumed with fear about a personal health issue. The "Finding a Gift in Each Experience" story and the corresponding tool, which is a prayer asking to see the bigger picture and understand the gift that is being given, was a gentle reminder to me to stay focused on the gift of each experience as I begin new adventures at this time in my life.
This book is a wonderful support to all those on a path of renewal of body, mind, and spirit and readers will appreciate the simplicity, honesty, and clarity with which Carol shares her personal journey. I guarantee that you will find at least one tool (and probably many more!) to use immediately and that you will want to share your experience and the book, Simple Healing Tools, with your closest friends. Hopefully you will also share your story with Carol on her website. Then, we'll all join Carol on the Oprah show one day in the near future and share our transformational stories made possible through the use of some very simple healing tools. Thank you Carol!
~J.K. from Pittsburg, CA
WOW! Carol Hansen Grey has done it again!
First she graced the world with her Lighten Up CD and workbook that not only taught us the importance of loving ourselves but gave us specific instructions on how to reach that state of unconditional self-love. Then she gave us her Free Yourself from Fear process that helped us transform all our negative thoughts and bring ourselves into a state of inner peace. Now she has given us the créme de la créme with her Simple Healing Tools! This book not only includes the above processes, it contains a wealth of wisdom from her years of teaching what she herself needed to learn! What a gift to the planet!!
~Mary from New York, NY
Do Yourself a Favor: Read this Simple Healing Tools!!
Carol Hansen Grey has given the world a beautiful, grounded, informative and definitely helpful book that is fun to read, food for your soul and a manual for healing and maintaining robust health. Her authentic life stories, meaningful tools and current resources make this a tool for everyone interested in being master of his or her life. Set yourself on the path to personal empowerment by reading and using this gem of creative self-exploration and unfoldment!
~Susan from Concord, CA
These Simple Healing Tools are a gift of love...
This inspirational book is practical, thoughtful and I refer to it often as it reinforces my belief that I am on the right path... I like the fact that I can seek out the story that corresponds with what I'm feeling at the moment, feel uplifted by it and then go deeper by further reading the tool which gives me instant action to take... prior to reading this book, Carol and her husband Victor's "Free Yourself from Fear" CD transformed the way I relate to what might be perceived as obstacles in my life and restored my sense of faith... this book is a great tool in itself for me to refer to in my day to day life as I delight in this amazing time where I find myself recreating myself and enjoying the process thanks to Carol Hansen Grey! What a gift, I highly recommend it.
~Zia from Walnut Creek, CA
Simple, but Powerful!
This book just saved my marriage of 34 years. I was ready to throw it all in when Carol's book arrived in the mail. Thumbing through the book, I was drawn to story #9, Letting Go of Judgments. Then I skipped backwards to #8, Paying attention to the signals. Back and forth through the book I went, finding comfort in Carols stories and suggestions in the tools.
Before the book, my plan was to create a big scene to show my husband that I knew what was going on and how he was hurting me. Following some of the tools, I sat down and mediated on what I truly wanted. I discovered that what I wanted was a warm close relationship with husband built on trust. If I couldn't have that, I didn't want a relationship. Instead of big drama, I used the Healing Tools to create on of the best days of our marriage. We had a long and loving conversation. We are working on repairing our relationship by improving our communication and shared goals.
All this came about because Carol Hansen Grey has great wisdom and insights. She shares them with us in a very easy and accessible way. Thank you Carol!
~Cyd from Sacramento, CA
Full of Wisdom
This book is so full of wisdom and self-help tools that I highly recommend it to all who want to have a happy and healthy life. It is filled with wonderful stories from the author's experience and easy exercises for healing and empowerment. One of my favorite stories in the book is "Working Your Joy". It gives a definition of sin being that of seeing your next step and not taking it. Simple Healing Tools helps us all to take the next step and steps in living a healthy, prosperous and full life. Go buy it for yourself and others. Namaste!!!
~Ann from Naples, FL
A Lifetime of Wisdom in This Book
Carol Hansen Grey has put together a lifetime of healing tools, that are simple to use and easy to continue using, with powerful results. So often, we commit to a new practice, only to give it up in a few days. This is not the case with Simple Healing Tools. The exercises are easy to remember and to put into action.
After reading the book, I went back to look at a couple of the passages that I underscored. One that stands out is, "We have been taught: it is selfish to love ourselves; we are bad if we love ourselves; we are not lovable unless we look a certain way or behave in a 'normal' manner. Therefore, we have been conditioned since childhood to look at ourselves with negativity and even hate. I believe that there is a direct correlation between the amount of violence in the world and the huge number of people who do not love themselves!" Carol is onto something here.
~Judy from Clayton, CA
A Treasure Trove of Wisdom
Thank you, Carol, for gathering and sharing these simple, yet deeply transformative wisdom/healing tools. As I read thru the book, I had the feeling of sitting with a wise Auntie, one whose stories were food for the soul, whose wisdom was born of intentional experience and freely shared with Love.
Accompanying each story is a treasure trove of exercises -- from manifestation to meditation, presence to prayer, freeing ourselves from fear to engaging our angels in support of our dreams.
Carol is authentically audacious and holistically in-tune with what it takes to thrive in our unique journey of Life, and reflects this with speed, ease and agility. A true mark of one who embodies what they teach!
Pick up a copy AND one to share ... you will be grateful for the insight, tools and comfort found in the wisdom gracing these pages. Enjoy!
~Stacey from Vancouver, WA
Carol Hansen Grey provides practical and helpful ways to grow, heal and strengthen one's sense of Self. The processes are simple and powerful. Anyone that uses even a few of these simple activities will benefit and live a life of increased health and wellness. Way to go, Carol!
~Lynn from Pleasanton, CA
In this inspiring, easy-to-read book of simple healing tools, Carol Hansen shares workshop participant's, as well as her own, experiences with these tools in brief yet powerful stories that illustrate life improvement in relationships, health, finance, career and self worth. If a person were to implement only one of these tools, their life would change for the better in some meaningful way.
~ Megan from Walnut Creek, CA